Usually I'm pretty good at seeing both the details of a situation and the big picture. It's something I've taken pride in over the years. Perhaps a little too much pride as it seems I've been missing the big picture for awhile now.
The pride of owning a home has been somewhat blinding. In truth, letting go of this house and ownership of it has been coming for years. Deep down Charlie and I have known this but stuffed it away and tried to ignore the truth.
I'm a little jacked up on cold remedies and not sure I can make a lot of sense... but if i listed the pros and cons... there would simply be no contest. As much as I've loved the last 10 years here, this house has become a far bigger headache than it could ever be worth... especially in the last 4 years.
The idea of a ranch-style house, all on one level is very appealing right now. Charlie feels segregated from the family when he can't make the trip down then back up the stairs. It would give his knees a break. It would be easier also for our almost 12 year old rottie, Sugar who has suffered from joint problems her whole life, thanks to the mistreatment at the hands of her original owners.
More and more homes, especially older ones like those we're looking at, have hardwood or tile throughout the common areas and carpet only in bedrooms. This would ease a lot of our allergy issues and make keeping up with animal fur far more easy and energy efficient... Anything that can reduce a few bills would be welcome right now.
This house we're praying for right now has a screened in porch... meaning Daniel can stop hating on the poor duck. It's not Luna's fault he's a poop machine. With a screened in porch, Luna will have plenty of yard and not leave his droppings right outside the back door. Plus, poultry droppings are an excellent fertilizer and this way, they'll get deposited where they'll do some good rather than the cement deck we have now.
As far as my plants... the only thing I'll have to leave behind in the magnolia. *sighs*... that's okay. The other house has trees and even has winter blooming camellias, which I've wanted for years. Everything else, can be dug up, potted and transferred without a problem.
Granted, the house isn't in our hands yet. Waiting for a call back from someone who probably won't be free to call before evening has me on pins and needles... but even if that's not the house we end up with, there are still a lot like it available.
Packing is a daunting task. Krys and Steve have offered to help. That blew me away... I'm ill-accustomed to tackling such tasks with actual assistance. Not sure I'll know how to tell them to help!
This week, I'm focusing on gathering boxes and going through my own bedroom. Next week we'll sort out the rest of the house and garage into categories: Take, Storage, Yard Sale, Trash. We'll get a storage unit next week and begin moving things there.
I'm hoping weather will permit yard sales on the 22 and 29th of January. I'll post to Freecycle that anything left in the driveway after 4pm January 29 is free for the taking.
Krys and Steve have Jeeps and we can borrow Jerry's truck again if need be for moving things and trips to the dump.
I look around at the clutter of this house... at my haphazard "art wall" above the headboard, the doorway where we've measured 10 years worth of kid's growth, the permanent marker scribbles outside my bathroom door drawn by a 3 year-old John, the hundreds and hundreds of books (harder even than craft materials to let go), yarn and various incarnations of wool everywhere...
It's going to be a big job.
If I let it, it can be cathartic and cleansing.
I don't know where we're going yet... but I do know we'll get there.
If I can put together a plan and lists to go along with it, I can get through this with a minimum of twitching and confusion. Really... I can do it.